Triticum Turgidum

Lying Dormant and Waiting to Bloom Since 2005

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Location: The Prairie, Illinois, United States

I am a beauty-loving ambidextrous higher-order primate who learned transcendental meditation at 7, statistical analysis at 23, tap dancing at 30, and piano at 35. I tolerate gluten, lactose, and differences of opinion, but not abuse. Or beets.

Sunday, January 29, 2006

Little Does She Know

People keep asking whether Cowgirl can "sense" that I'm pregnant. My answer is no. If she's noticed that there is less room on my lap than there was before, she isn't distressed about it. I think she fancies my bump a keen new pillow upon which to curl up when I'm lying on my side (very uncomfortable). And she really seems to love her cool new furniture, including the crib (above) and thick cozy floor rug.

T minus two weeks and counting, Cowgirl. We're all in for a biiiiiig adjustment.

I haven't posted much about my pregnancy because most of what I've been told about pregnancy and childbirth (and childrearing for that matter) has been frightening. It's something I deal with privately. But tonight I got a completely unexpected email message from one of the members of my book group. They threw a surprise book-themed shower for me last weekend and gave me food to freeze for meals after the baby's born. They're wonderful women. The message I received tonight from Anne has given me the first real feeling of hope and optimism I've had since becoming pregnant. I thought I'd share it here.

Dear Kris,

Have you noticed, when you’re pregnant, people like to tell you horror stories about their own pregnancies and difficult births and whatnot? When I had my first baby, it seemed everyone I met was compelled to share: relatives, friends, total strangers. They all had a story to tell, and some of the stories were kind of scary.

Okay, check this out. I had 3 kids. They are 24, 15, and 7 now. Each pregnancy, birth, and child was totally different, save for one thing: each was an extremely positive experience for me. And you know what else? Taking care of a baby is much more pleasant than being pregnant. And you know what else? You’re not likely to need anyone helping you with the baby when you bring her home, either. I had only their respective fathers, and that’s all that was necessary. You and your husband are intelligent adults (well, I know you are anyway, and I would expect your husband to be as well), and you’re going to get along just fine, I know it.

After I had Jamie, I realized no one had told me how absolutely wonderful the experience would be… and it was, wonderful I mean… and exciting and awe-inspiring. The day she was born was the very best day of my life, bar none. To this day, I wonder why no one ever told me how incredibly happy I would be. The whole birth experience is something that should not be missed. Why does no one tell us that? Okay, so I’m telling you. It’s a wonderful thing.

All the best, Anne

I'm going to print this out and pack it in my hospital bag. Thanks Anne.


Blogger PFG said...

Good lord that is cute. Love the bandana.

8:20 PM, January 29, 2006  
Blogger Berlinbound said...

I found your blog via two other sites, and a comment you made about the obligation of one spouse to do something for the other when asked - even in it was uncomfortable. I thought your contribution was very thoughtful.

And now I see that you are about to have a child ... what joy awaits. I hope to read about your experiences here.

12:32 AM, January 30, 2006  
Blogger WinterWheat said...

Many thanks, Berlinbound! BTW, I've always wanted to visit Germany. One of the major research associations I belong to is holding its annual conference in Dresden, but unfortunately I can't go because of the baby. :-(

11:39 AM, January 30, 2006  
Blogger cjblue said...

I think part of the horror story thing is that some people consider it kind of a badge of honor - Look what I did to have a child! I am thinking back, wondering if I personally gave you horror stories. I think mostly I just tried to be honest, because (horror stories aside) I don't think a lot of people were very honest with me.

Then there's the other group of people, the same people who made ball & chain-type jokes to your husband before your wedding. My husband heard daily before our first daughter was born "Oh, your life is never going to be the same!"

Duh. If we wanted it to be the same we probably wouldn't have gone this route.

Anne said it beautifully. You are lucky to have wonderful friends.


1:06 PM, January 30, 2006  
Blogger WinterWheat said...

Hey R,

I don't think you were one of the horror-story people. You've provided an honest assessment of the challenges AND the rewards. Reading about your girls has been inspiring; makes me look forward to when they get older and increasingly, er, interesting.


6:19 PM, January 30, 2006  
Blogger Parisjasmal said...

What a beautiful letter. Three Cheers for Anne!

I wish you all the best! Beautiful, healthy, and wonderful in all aspects!

8:07 AM, January 31, 2006  
Blogger mreenymo said...

Hello, beautiful woman!

Sorry, but I could not disagree more with your friend. In fact, what I heard from my mom, grandmother and other significant women in my life was just how extraordinarily happy they were when they gave birth. No matter what happens with the labor and delivery, that day will be the BEST DAY of your life!!

You can count on that, babe!

Hugs and love to you and G!

12:59 PM, January 31, 2006  
Anonymous Jonniker said...

OMG, and here I've been asking you to regale me with *your* horror story, should you have one, because I have been, oddly, on the opposite side. I have only heard positives, and I feel SURE that they are lying. My friend Colleen was so flipping positive about it that she swore she said to her husband *in the delivery room*, "Oh my god! I want nine more. LET'S DO IT AGAIN!" (sure enough, she's pregnant with Kidlet #3)

I'm really excited for you, Kris. You are so ready for this, and it's going to be so much fun! SO FUN! And I totally believe you're going to love being a mom. That part doesn't seem so scary at all. In fact, it seems like a blast. So much fun. I'm really really excited for you and G. And Baby H-K.

9:47 PM, January 31, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Kris lets get down to the important stuff, 2 more weeks and Real FOOD again !! I would be planning my first meal of pure junk.
All the best in birthing HER.My stories are all good ,sorry no horror here. I think a good deal of exageration has been put into labour storys.Mine are fairly boring really ,three pushs with pain and it was over . But finally seeing the babe amazing !!
Wishing you a good experience and a short labour . Hoping for some great photos of your darling girl soon. Ox's Katie

4:40 AM, February 01, 2006  
Blogger WinterWheat said...

Katie, you won't believe this. I applied for an increase in life insurance and was rejected because of the GD. My OB nurse said I should continue to follow the GD diet while breastfeeding so my sugars will remain low for any subsequent glucose tolerance tests I may need to have to satisfy the insurance company. :-O GD this GD!! >:-( (On the up side, thank you for the encouraging comments!)

9:11 AM, February 01, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

OH F.the damm AIC tells no lies!!! But after a few days you should pull lower levels anyway ,if you go down to 5's just go ahead Cheat & eat .Curse Curse I will come down an give the d blood for you !!!!! with you Ox's Katie

2:55 PM, February 01, 2006  
Blogger mireille said...

*proud to have conveyed no horror stories* *proud of mother-to-be-extremely*soon* ♥ xoxo

9:12 PM, February 01, 2006  
Blogger Bela said...

My mother used to tell horror stories about my birth. I wonder if it affected me in any way? LOL!

Hope your little girl doesn't give you a hard time. :-)

10:10 PM, February 01, 2006  
Blogger Atreau said...

Aww, that made me cry! You are so blessed to have friends like that! Cheers to the new chapter in your life! ♥

11:53 PM, February 01, 2006  

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