How to Love Thy Brother
1) Let him visit, dressed in nothing but a beige prison jumpsuit and black combat boots, because nothing else fits his 6'6", 400-lb frame, and take him and his unshowered body and his shaved head out to a Midwestern family restaurant with your elderly dad and your little girl, and refuse to feel embarrassed when everyone stares at you -- indeed, allow yourself to feel amused and a little proud in an I-am-in-a-David-Lynch-film-what's-your-excuse sort of way -- and treat him to breakfast.
2) Give in to his heartfelt "Please" and allow him to have one more glass of whiskey the night before when it's clear that half a bottle won't be enough to put him to sleep. Resolve to save the intervention for later.
3) Let him hold and play with your baby daughter, and feel grateful that all he does is laugh when she pokes him in the face.
4) After he returns home, let him call you at 6:00am, drunk after an all-night bender (his, not yours), and offer encouragement that he is not stupid, that his life is valuable, that he is immensely talented, and that better times are definitely coming. Repeat weekly for a period of six months.
5) Forgive him for being the monster under the bed of your childhood, and recognize that in spite of all the parental attention he commanded, you ended up the lucky one.
2) Give in to his heartfelt "Please" and allow him to have one more glass of whiskey the night before when it's clear that half a bottle won't be enough to put him to sleep. Resolve to save the intervention for later.
3) Let him hold and play with your baby daughter, and feel grateful that all he does is laugh when she pokes him in the face.
4) After he returns home, let him call you at 6:00am, drunk after an all-night bender (his, not yours), and offer encouragement that he is not stupid, that his life is valuable, that he is immensely talented, and that better times are definitely coming. Repeat weekly for a period of six months.
5) Forgive him for being the monster under the bed of your childhood, and recognize that in spite of all the parental attention he commanded, you ended up the lucky one.
posted by WinterWheat | 1:11 PM
5 Comments:
I'm not sure I could do this. I'm proud of your ability to do it, and your heart. It breaks mine. xoxo
Yep, you are the lucky one, darling. Keep repeating that mantra to yourself the next time he calls you at 6 AM with yet another crisis.
Hugs and love!
Yes, you sure are.
xoxo
Wow, you are a *much* better person than I am! (Was there ever any doubt?) I can't imagine either T or J as they exist now. I still have the mental image of the slightly older teenage brothers etched in my mind. T let us listen to Ozzy Osbourne as we lounged on his water bed. Then J used to have those goofy Jimi Hendrix impersonations he'd do for us. (On the days he was in a *better* mood).
You've moved and grown so much since those days, accomplishing so much, and yet they have never really progressed. It would be so easy for you to just "move on" but you have lovingly kept in touch with the very people who made your life so miserable growing up. In the end you are the lucky one; but so are they for having such a loving, forgiving, awesome sister and friend like you.
Girl, you ROCK!
Much love,
Bless your heart.
If I had a sister, I would want her to be as smart, funny, beautiful, kind, forgiving and empathetic as you.
Hugs to you and baby Flea.
Post a Comment
<< Home